To Watch A Tree Grow

 In October of 2019, at 4 months sober, I found myself needing a job. While I had been hired as a TA at Clifty Creek Elementary, the take home pay wouldn’t have paid the bills. So here I was still living at my Great Aunts needing a job, but knowing I needed a safe bubble.  Drugs are rampant here in South Central Indiana as they are everywhere.  Seeking the Lord and Obeying His voice, Heaven Scent Cleaning was born. Immediately, it was a success and of course Jireh gets all of the Glory as the business was truly Heaven Sent. The CoVid shut down definitely slowed things down for a season, but business soon picked back up. So much so I was blessed to send overflow work to a couple of gals at church gifting them that Heaven sent start. Then suddenly in late fall of 2021 things headed south.  I lost several customers for various reasons. One Mom decided to go back to school putting her home to clean. Another families budget took a dive. One customer I dropped after being ...

What a week it has been.  A wicked rollercoaster 🎢 of tragedy and triumph. There were moments of terrible grief, utter sadness, and dark despair. Moments of failed expectations, doubt, disbelief, and horrific truths. It was easy to get distracted. My focus turning from this situation to that circumstance until it all became to heavy to bear. That’s when I found myself back at the feet of Jesus, doing all I could to stay ✝️ - Eyed. Focusing solely on who God is no matter what everything around me looked like.  It’s easy to focus on all the chaos and confusion rather than the solution, but He is the Way, the Truth, and the Life (John14:6,) and until I looked to Him to point the way through I was completely overcome and coming undone. BUT GOD “He reached down from Heaven and rescued me out of DEEP waters(2 Sam 22:17.”)  John 10:10 tells us that the devil comes to kill, steal, and destroy robbing me of the abundant life I have in Christ Jesus, and man was he succeeding. ...

  Bella made it through her surgery today. She did fantastic. She still has both of her legs, only one looks a little different after rotation plasty. Please continue to pray for her and the Campbell family as they walk through this season. We know that if God, brought us to it He will bring us through it. His ways are not our ways. He is still Good. We are still His precious children. We know He loves us.  Which is key on days like today. Bella's journey was only the first wave of today's storm, and I'm not talking about the Spring Forecast.  Heading back to work from lunch, I stopped for my 50 cent West End Soda just a few blocks from the church, passing by a family/childhood friend/best friends brother/Dad to 3 of my fave kids from Youth as I do. Only today first responders are on scene. I say a prayer and head to the office. Before I can make the call my best pal messages me. Her brother is gone. I let her know I'll be right back, phone the childrens and youth Pasto...

  I believe it was back in November on a Friday night. Sitting in my car at CVS, while my friend ran inside, aimlessly scrolling facebook while my youngest daughter chatted me up from the back. Just a typical Friday night. The phone rings and it's Liv's other mother(her bffs Mom.) I'm thinking the girls have planned a slumber party behind my back and answer. Some days I wish I'd been right.  No get together invite. No call just to check in. Rather a call to battle.  After Coming home from school with a limp to the next day a monstrous swelling of her leg, they had been given seemingly terrifying and tragic news. Their 7 nearly 8 yr old bawl of zoe/joy/spunk Isabella had been diagnosed with Ewing Sarcoma. Bone Cancer.  I listen, we cry, I send her the elders numbers, and we pray one of the hardest prayers I've  ever prayed.  The last 5 months we have journeyed this mountain alongside our dear friends as Bella endured a grueling chemotherapy regimen, as her s...

  There's a Mack Brock song, "Prophesy Your Promise," it's been a constant earworm lately and on all of my playlist.   An earworm is a song that gets stuck in your head; so, today, I'm grateful it's Mack Brock and not Barney the Purple Dinosaur.   This song speaks to every fiber of my being.  "I found You in the middle of my mess You had been there all along Open arms and open heart, You called me in You didn't hesitate at all                                                              And the lies I once believed, they crumble At the weight of Your truth And the fear that gripped my heart, was arrested So that I can see You                                              When I only see in part I will p...

  My heads all over the place today. My girls, financial struggles, my home to do list, work stuff, co-parenting issues, my 9 yr old pal Bella battling cancer, recovery, ministry work, my throbbing bleeding thumb, my siblings, my family and their struggles, the upcoming Emmaus walk, my family that's locked up, a job offer I'm prayerfully considering, kidsitting Julian, this headache, this blog.  My focus is a pinball, just bouncing around the air up there, and then I hear Him say, "I will keep in perfect peace the one who is dependent on me."(Isaiah 26:3)  Gut check. I am too dependent on me. On self. Sure, I'm a survivor. I'm capable. I'm reliable. I'm I'm I'm. Matthew 6:33 doesn't say to seek Jessica's plan and all these things will be added. No wonder I'm overwhelmed.  Time to "put my thing down flip it and Let God reverse it."  Move Jess, Git Out the Way. Git Out the Way. Git Out the Way.  When My whole focus is solely...

It's by His Mercy and Grace I even made it this far. Just when it looked like I'd never make it out. He reached down in that pit and saved me. Today, I reached 1000 days, Redeemed, Recovered, and Restored. He takes broken things and makes them beautiful. After 24 years of running, from the Promise attached to my name, I am right where I belong. It doesn't matter that Day 1000 started out as a Glorious Day cleaning the Lord's church(It really was too. Productive and full of Fellowship and Kingdom Opportunity. I really do love my job as Custodial Minister of Maintenance at Cornerstone Community Church) when the school nurse called regarding my middle. 104 temp and flu like symptoms. "Yay," said no Mom ever. Especially this one. Single. Living on Faith. Paycheck to Paycheck. I haven't "made it on paper" once in over a year. BUT GOD! The bills are always paid and there's always food in the fridge. 1001 Days Ago Id be heading out to hustle, gotta ...